We have been making pretty good progress in our new home. All the boxes have been unpacked and now we only have a few pictures and decor items to find homes and we'll be good.
As for as the move itself, it has never been any smoother in all our moves with the military!
As soon as I am done reflecting on where I should put certain pictures and whatnot..I'll take a few photos.
On another note, and with every bit of expectation of it happening, Evan had a rough time at school last week. This week, though, seemed to be much better.
While we are discussing Evan..
...last week I was given the shocking news that our insurance provider has decided not to cover ABA anymore. Can I just tell you that I was in complete disbelief. We picked this provider due to it covering ABA therapy..and I was angered..to..tears..! And it just kept getting more ridiculous as I tried to sort it all out. I called the insurance company and got a yes..and called the therapist office and they said no..and then I called and talked to a manager who says they can bill certain codes, but not others..and then I. got. stuck. in. the. middle. of. it. I am a little dissapointed to say it was supposed to be worked out today..and we got absolutely nowhere.
Last week all I could do was just slump in my chair and wonder what on earth I can do about it?!!
But, I immediately stop trying to do..and just pray.
There is no fighting with people over the phone..no one to call and yell at..it's just a matter of praying.
But, I have this feeling in my gut...he's planning something better..and I can't hold on to what worked in the past. I have to move forward.
Yes, I want this to be fixed..but, I have been here many, many, many times before.
The circumstances are different, but these are the things that have happened most recently.
1. (someone gives me an ultimatum) or someone tells me that I am no longer able to get services for my child.
2. I flip out.
3. (I am forced to change directions) or my child is forced down a different path..that I didn't expect or choose.
4. I do not desire to go down that path. (I do not like green eggs and ham, sam I am..!)
5. I have a choice to make about whether or not it will make me bitter..and sadly I've always chosen to be bitter.
6. After I'm done with being bitter..seasons pass and then I realize things have worked out better than I thought. In fact, my original plan would have been really bad! (but, I wouldn't have been able to admit that for quite sometime after that!)
So, just so you know..I am here..praying for this to either get fixed or moving onto something better than I imagined.
And maybe..just maybe..my son is ready to move on from this..!
Don't get me wrong..I have fought this and I have advocated for Evan in every possible way I know how. But, I'm not letting it destroy my thoughts and actions like I have before.
Stuff like that has turned me bitter, turned me upside-rightside-inside-out, and unable to function correctly.
And I can't do that anymore.
So, I will put my faith in Christ..walk out something I believe..and take the next bend in the road that is before us. I'll take a deep breath..exhale..and then walk this thing forward as bravely as I can. I'll probably (since it's me) fail more than I can come to terms to along the way, but as long as I know that God looks down enough to care about me and that HE has never left me to coincidence and never, ever left to me to chance...I'm blessed!
It's an amazing thing, though, that he's sent friends to walk beside me and be a part of my journey...and I become a part of theirs..or maybe even yours..!
As for as the move itself, it has never been any smoother in all our moves with the military!
As soon as I am done reflecting on where I should put certain pictures and whatnot..I'll take a few photos.
On another note, and with every bit of expectation of it happening, Evan had a rough time at school last week. This week, though, seemed to be much better.
While we are discussing Evan..
...last week I was given the shocking news that our insurance provider has decided not to cover ABA anymore. Can I just tell you that I was in complete disbelief. We picked this provider due to it covering ABA therapy..and I was angered..to..tears..! And it just kept getting more ridiculous as I tried to sort it all out. I called the insurance company and got a yes..and called the therapist office and they said no..and then I called and talked to a manager who says they can bill certain codes, but not others..and then I. got. stuck. in. the. middle. of. it. I am a little dissapointed to say it was supposed to be worked out today..and we got absolutely nowhere.
Last week all I could do was just slump in my chair and wonder what on earth I can do about it?!!
But, I immediately stop trying to do..and just pray.
There is no fighting with people over the phone..no one to call and yell at..it's just a matter of praying.
But, I have this feeling in my gut...he's planning something better..and I can't hold on to what worked in the past. I have to move forward.
Yes, I want this to be fixed..but, I have been here many, many, many times before.
The circumstances are different, but these are the things that have happened most recently.
1. (someone gives me an ultimatum) or someone tells me that I am no longer able to get services for my child.
2. I flip out.
3. (I am forced to change directions) or my child is forced down a different path..that I didn't expect or choose.
4. I do not desire to go down that path. (I do not like green eggs and ham, sam I am..!)
5. I have a choice to make about whether or not it will make me bitter..and sadly I've always chosen to be bitter.
6. After I'm done with being bitter..seasons pass and then I realize things have worked out better than I thought. In fact, my original plan would have been really bad! (but, I wouldn't have been able to admit that for quite sometime after that!)
So, just so you know..I am here..praying for this to either get fixed or moving onto something better than I imagined.
And maybe..just maybe..my son is ready to move on from this..!
Don't get me wrong..I have fought this and I have advocated for Evan in every possible way I know how. But, I'm not letting it destroy my thoughts and actions like I have before.
Stuff like that has turned me bitter, turned me upside-rightside-inside-out, and unable to function correctly.
And I can't do that anymore.
So, I will put my faith in Christ..walk out something I believe..and take the next bend in the road that is before us. I'll take a deep breath..exhale..and then walk this thing forward as bravely as I can. I'll probably (since it's me) fail more than I can come to terms to along the way, but as long as I know that God looks down enough to care about me and that HE has never left me to coincidence and never, ever left to me to chance...I'm blessed!
It's an amazing thing, though, that he's sent friends to walk beside me and be a part of my journey...and I become a part of theirs..or maybe even yours..!
It'll work out. I want you to try RDI, even just basic principles, I think it will help a lot. The more we do ABA, the less I think it offers. I think this cloud will have a silver lining for you.
ReplyDeleteI echo what Sarah said.... ;-)
ReplyDeleteI also believe there is something to be said about "forced" change! It is challenging, but the good will come out of it! You've already taken the huge first step in laying down the bitterness...even if you have to do that multiple times a day(or hour?!?!)
There have been so many changes in you since Evan has been born. God has used that little boy and the challenges he brings to make you stronger and wiser, yet still dependent on Him. The best part-you get the love a sweet little boy at the end of each day to help you forget all the hard parts.
ReplyDeleteI am sure that however this turns out, you will see God's hand all over it and you and Evan will both be better for it,